Historical reenactors accidentally restart the 100 Years’ War
Posted on 11th March 2017 at 18:21
A group of English and French historical reenactors have accidentally restarted the 100 Years’ War, after their recreation of the Battle of Agincourt got out of hand.
A group of English and French historical reenactors have accidentally restarted the 100 Years’ War, after their recreation of the Battle of Agincourt got out of hand. The re-enactment, which featured several thousand men on either side, took place near the French town of Fruges in Northern France. Unfortunately some of the reenactors took the engagement ‘a bit too seriously’, resulting in several thousand fatalities and a resumption of Anglo-French hostilities.
An observer told The Spark that the engagement stated ‘as you’d expect’, with English and French reenactors forming up on opposite sides of a field, and then clashing with swords and spears in mock combat. However he noted that the fights started getting ‘increasingly aggressive’, and the next thing he knew there was ‘blood, limbs and human intestines’ flying in all directions.
This version of events was verified by Andy Peters, a postman from Derby who was taking part in the re-enactment. He told us that he began the engagement by exchanging ‘gentle blows’ with his French counterparts, but after a while ‘the red mist descended’ and he found himself possessed by a ‘savage blood lust’. Andy explained that his rage was probably motivated by a desire to ‘avenge the 1996 French ban on British beef imports’, though he later admitted that the bottle and a half of whisky he’d consumed before the engagement ‘might have been a contributing factor’.
Andy added that by the time the reenactors had ‘calmed down a bit’ the ground was littered with human corpses, and the English had sacked and burnt the French cities of Lille and Calais. In response the French Government formally annulled the 1475 Treaty of Picquigny, which ended the 100 Years’ War, leading to a resumption of all-out conflict between France and the United Kingdom, the sucessor state to England.
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