The European Union has formally insisted that it must be given four pints of former UKIP leader Nigel Farage’s blood as part of any Brexit deal. 
The European Union has formally insisted that it must be given four pints of former UKIP leader Nigel Farage’s blood as part of any Brexit deal. The demand was made by European Commission President Jean-Claude Juncker at a Brussels press conference, who emphasised that it is ‘completely non-negotiable’. 
 
Junker went on to note that the EU might be prepared to compromise with Britain on secondary issues, such as ‘immigration and single market access’, but insisted that ‘we absolutely must have Farage’s blood’. He added that he planned to keep the blood in a jar on his desk ‘to cheer me up during miserable days’. 
 
British politicians have been responding positively to Juncker’s demand. Prime Minister Theresa May reportedly described the request as ‘reasonable’ noting that she had been prepared to offer ‘up to eight pints of Farage’s blood’. Meanwhile opposition leader Jeremy Corbyn stated that he thinks the UK should ‘chuck in his arms as well as a goodwill gesture’. 
 
Nigel Farage’s office has so far refused to comment formally. However UKIP sources have told The Spark that the party is planning to make a counter offer, offering to give the EU all three gold medals party leader Paul Nuttall won at the 2008 Beijing Olympics. 
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