Newly inaugurated President Trump has started wondering where his predecessor, President Obama, hid all the White House toilet paper. 
Newly inaugurated President Trump has started wondering where his predecessor, President Obama, hid all the White House toilet paper. Speaking anonymously a senior White House source explained that nobody had any idea ‘where the Obama’s hid the toilet paper’, and that this was starting to have a real impact on the ‘moral and general hygiene’ of Trump and his top aides. 
 
The source explained that Trump’s team had been unable to find any toilet paper in the White House since his inauguration on 20 January. Instead they have been reduced to ‘wiping their arses with copies of the American constitution’ which he described as an ‘accurate metaphor for the new administration’. He noted that it was a straight choice between this and ‘the sheets of sandpaper’ which Obama had left in the White House toilets. 
 
One of Trump’s close aids admitted to The Spark that the new administration had been ‘having difficulties’ finding toilet paper, adding that ‘the whole place is really starting to smell’. 
 
When we contacted Obama’s office they we’re unable to provide an official statement, primarily because they couldn’t stop laughing down the phone. Eventually they promised that they would tell Trump where the toilet paper is hidden as soon as ‘he stops being a dick to minority groups’. 
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