Putin starts worrying that he might be a dick
Posted on 11th February 2017 at 11:21
Russian President Vladimir Putin has reportedly started worrying that he might actually be a bit of a dick.
Russian President Vladimir Putin has reportedly started worrying that he might actually be a bit of a dick. Sources close to Putin have revealed that the Russian leader has recently started asking whether there might be ‘moral issues’ around having his opponents murdered and invading neighbouring countries, adding that he was starting to wonder whether ‘I’m such a good guy after all’.
Our sources reveal that Putin recently had a ‘eureka moment’ whilst watching the carpet bombing of Aleppo on TV. Putin reportedly told his aids that the bombing was ‘so horrible – somebody should stop it’ before being reminded that he had ordered the attacks himself around five hours earlier.
Putin has also started questioning the morality of some of his allies, such as Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad and Chechen strongman Ramzan Kadyrov. He’s apparently noted that ‘those guys torture and kill people’ before asking ‘isn’t that what the evil guys do in the movies?’
In addition the Russian leader is apparently having second thoughts about new American President Donald Trump, who he assisted during the election campaign. Putin recently told one of his advisers that ‘I though Trump was a morally upstanding, family man’ and was getting concerned that ‘this might not be the case’.
So far the Kremlin has refused to comment publically on these reports. We did send a journalist to Moscow to investigate the matter further, but we’ve been having trouble getting hold of him over the last couple of weeks.
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