Vladamir Putin struggles to show his sensitive side
Posted on 18th February 2017 at 20:13
It’s been reported that Russian President Vladamir Putin is having ‘extreme difficulty’ convincing the world that he has a sensitive side.
It’s been reported that Russian President Vladamir Putin is having ‘extreme difficulty’ convincing the world that he has a sensitive side. Kremlin sources have revealed that Putin is keen to show that he can be ‘kind and caring’ and a ‘lover of culture’ rather than just a brutal killer.
A senior Kremlin official told The Spark that Putin’s failure thus far to ‘persuade the world that he is a good man’ is causing him ‘significant mental distress’. He noted that in recent weeks the Russian leader has been spotted wandering around the Kremlin at night shouting ‘I have feelings as well you know’, which the source said was starting to get on his nerves.
However the source added that all of Putin’s attempts to prove that he ‘can be a decent bloke’ have backfired. To take one example a few months ago, as a gesture of friendship, Putin instructed that a bottle of caviar be sent to a key opposition politician. Unfortunately Russian intelligence misunderstood Putin’s order, and sent a poisoned bottle of caviar, and the politician died shortly afterwards. Putin has also taken to trying to demonstrate a friendly side by ‘cuddling white cats’ but unfortunately this ‘just makes him look like a Bond villain’.
As a result the Russian Government has announced that it will shortly be releasing a series of ‘information films’ depicting the Russian leader in a more positive light. These will show Putin paining with watercolours, befriending a baby dear, building an orphanage and ‘definitely not invading Ukraine’.
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